


Sweet Sugar Honey Bunch

by nak



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Emotional Hurt, Fluff, Kageyama swears a lot, M/M, POV Alternating
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-26
Updated: 2016-01-22
Packaged: 2018-03-09 05:20:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,227
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3237794
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nak/pseuds/nak
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He's so dumb, but Kageyama must be dumber, because they cancel out each others stupidity to become one genius entity.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Day After

Hinata groans and rolls over, grasping around blindly for the snooze button located somewhere on his bedside table. 

Feeling around for the button, he accidentally knocks over a small, cutely wrapped bag, little spiral ribbons tied tightly around the middle, lumpy plastic thudding against the floor. He ends the incessant buzzing, and rolls back over, pulling the blanket up tightly over his head, memories from last night rushing back. His breathing gets a little faster, eyes screwed tight, heart hammering against his chest.

He pops up, arms stretching towards the ceiling and groaning, covers falling to the wayside of the bed.

“Aaaaggghhhh… maybe I’ll skip.” Hinata exhales with a huff, jumping out of bed, already changing his mind. He can't miss practice, but seeing Kageyama...

 _Then again, guess I’d better deal with it directly. Like ripping off a band aid._

Hinata ruffles through a pile of clothes on the floor, spotting a clean pair of pants and pulling them on, when he stumbles backwards over the small bag that had fallen off his nightstand, wildly pushing his leg out to avoid crushing it.

_That was close._

He leans over and picks up the bag, wrinkling his nose.

 _Just face it head on, no messing around. Sooner rather than later, that’s always better._  
Thoughtfully regarding the cute, polka dot wrapping, Hinata pulls the spiral ribbons keeping the bag shut tight, undoing the knot. It opens with a pull, and Hinata pops a small, thumbprint sized sugar cookie into his mouth from the little pile inside.

 _Sweet._

His phone buzzes on his desk. He pads over, giving the clock a wary glance, and checks his new message, licking some excess sugar off his lips. He had a missed call from- what? 

_4:00 am? What did Kageyama want at four in the morning?_

Hinata thinks about last night, his face getting a little red. Opting to not think about it for a little bit longer, he taps his messages.

**—New Text—  
Kageyama ヽ(ｏ`皿′ｏ)ﾉ**

_Are you coming to practice?_

The feeling of not getting enough air to his lungs returned, heart hammering and face screwing up in an unreadable mess of emotions. What does Kageyama care? After last night, he figured the quick spike was dead in the ground, tombstone erected, farm bought and paid for. 

**—Reply—**

_baka kageyama!! baaaaka!!! baaaaaaaaaaaaaaka!!!!!!!!_

He quickly taps out some excessive exclamation points and taps “send”, shoving his phone in his school bag and running downstairs, where Natsu's sleepily grinning up at him from the kitchen table. He shrugs on his jacket and grins right back. "Good morning!" 

“Shoyou, your lunch is on the counter- take some toast with you on the way to school, you’ll have to run! Did you have trouble getting to sleep, last night?” His mom chides him, smearing mashed up avocado on a thick piece of toast, some scrambled egg peeking out underneath. God, Hinata loves his mom.

“Yeah,” Hinata scratches the back of his head sheepishly, smiling and putting his lunch in his bag. “I have a lot on my mind, you know?! It takes awhile to process!” As he’s talking, he can feel his bag buzzing and his heart skips a beat, his mom taking in his expression with a twinkle in her eye. "Ah, youth."

He gets a kiss on the cheek and a pat on the head. “Oh, Shoyou, you’ll make yourself sick, moving so fast all the time. Try to slow down a little bit, okay? Sort things out when you’re calm, _and well rested,_ ” His mom squeezes his hand lovingly, with a mildly threatening harder squeeze to emphasize that he needs to sleep more. 

“You better get going. See you tonight! Have fun!” Hinata ruffles Natsu’s messy hair, a mirror image of his own, and she giggles, all drowsy sunshine and smiles. He grabs the toast, and is rushing to the door, putting it in his mouth.

“See you later! Love you!” He’s on his bike, pedaling hard, toast already devoured. He takes in the scenery while he glides down a hill, noticing the sun has already risen. He really is running late.

He’s about halfway to school when he sees that freakishly sleek black hair and morbidly gloomy air. He brakes to a slow stop, afraid of the unholy retribution about to be slam dunked on his entire life.

“Hey, Kageyama.” He hesitates to lift a hand in greeting, but the expression on his face causes him to automatically shrink back, only cowering a little bit in fear. It’s very slightly on the edge of pathetic.

The tall figure looms over him, face contorting from a grumpy pout to a full on, angry grimace. Hinata’s blood goes cold. _God_ , this kid is going to have the most _intense_ frown lines when they’re older.

“What the fuck. You idiot. What the fuck.” A hushed monotone of expletives are falling out of his mouth, rapidly, and Hinata shrinks back a bit more at each one. Kageyama raises his hand, and Hinata’s eyes squeeze tightly shut on reflex- he raises his arms quickly in defense, steadying himself for a blow.

“ _Idiot,_ ” he hears Kageyama whisper, and then feels a large weight on his head, Kageyama’s hand lightly squeezing his scalp, only slightly menacing. “I can’t believe you have the gall to show your face to me.”

Hinata opens one eye, arms still crossed in front of him, slightly hopeful. “But, Kageyama, you’re the one waiting for me halfway, like everything’s normal.”

He had said the wrong thing. Kageyama’s slightly menacing squeeze turns into a vice grip, and Hinata’s yelping, swatting him away. He already misses the feeling of his fingers, soft on his hair. _I'm so screwed._

Kageyama’s face is pinched, and God, does he have to look so pissed off and scary all the time? Hinata wistfully recalls when things were normal, less than 24 hours ago, Kageyama steadily growing past the constant “I-have-to-take-a-huge-shit” expressions over the months they've known each other and reaching a happy middle, generally chilling out after they had grown closer, letting Hinata see his soft expressions, playing volleyball completely in sync and doing everything together, a team behind him and a best friend in tow. 

But no, he had to fuck everything up. He'll never get to see how soft his eyes go when Hinata spikes his tosses, mouth tugging up in approval, making his heart flutter. _It's all over,_ Hinata thinks with a grimace, _Because I couldn't keep it in my pants._

Ah. No, he’s still suppressing that. It didn’t happen. He starts wheeling his bike, rubbing his head, Kageyama grumpily striding along next to him. He's silent and glancing down with an almost worried-like tendency, probably scared of _him_ , worried Hinata will kiss him or something gross and disgusting. 

Hinata's heart gets tight thinking about how they've spent the past year walking to school together, non-grumpily, having already grown as friends, allowing normal, friendly walks, as friends.

He’s gripping his bike handle tight. Feeling like his heart is going to spill over, he snaps his head up, trying to keep his pace steady.

“Why-“

“Do you-“

He looks at Kageyama, who is snapping his head back down, looking like he deeply regrets gathering up the gumption to talk just as Hinata had. He glances back up at Hinata, who is steadfastly staring back, and looks right back down. 

“You go.” He mumbles, and Hinata shakes his head quickly. He wants to get this over with. If Kageyama wants this to be the last time they walk together, so be it. He deserves it.

“No, you go. I’m sorry.” Kageyama looks a little upset, and Hinata cringes. No amount of apologies were going to fix this. The reality of the situation suddenly came crashing down on him- this could be it. This could be the end of their friendship. With just a couple of words, Kageyama could completely destroy him. He could end his status as a regular team member, but even more than that, even more _fucking terrifying_ than that, he could end their friendship.

And Hinata wouldn’t recover. He knows it. He would be completely wrecked. Because he loves him, and he’s fucked, and he never should have tried to force him into anything more, because now everything is trash, he’s ruined it all.

“Don’t apologize. Dumb.” Kageyama looks almost offended, and reproaches Hinata, who is silently shutting down inside, unbeknownst to the idiot boy responsible for it. He doesn’t need this faux pity, like he shouldn’t feel bad. It’s only going to make what’s coming next worst.

“‘Why’ what?” Hinata asks, bike wobbling. _Get it together._ Kageyama’s silent for a second, thoughtful, looking straight ahead. They’re almost at school. They should be running, they’re going to be late, but time feels slower, like he’s moving through syrup and quick sand all at once.

“Why didn’t you pick up last night? I called you. I really…” He takes a breath, and Hinata holds his.

_...Was disgusted. I really hate you. I really don’t want to be friends. I really think you’re bad at volleyball. I really don’t need you._

“…wanted to talk to you. About last night. Or, I guess, earlier. It was like, four in the morning. I couldn’t sleep.” Kageyama glances over, quickly, expression unreadable. "I... think you were awake, then. Maybe."

Hinata blinks, feeling a slow burn in his chest. He feels a little out of it, like he can’t fully process what Kageyama is saying. 

“Yeah, I couldn’t sleep either.” Hinata replies, raspily. "How'd you know?"

Kageyama looks up, now, clearly miffed, and comes to a stop in front of the changing room doors, empty inside now, they’re so late.

“I gathered as much from the black fucking holes that're the bags under your eyes.“ Hinata touches his face, wondering if he really looks that bad. "I could've helped, you know." Kageyama's looking at him straight on, now, and Hinata doesn't think his heart can take much more of Kageyama looking at him like this. He's taking a deep breath now, Kageyama's eyes flashing. "Do you-"

“Oy! Hinata, Kageyama! You’re late! Get changed and get to the gym, we’re almost done with stretches!” Daichi’s yelling from across the courtyard, waving his arms and going back inside.

Kageyama looks back at Hinata, looking tired, all of a sudden, exhausted- and Hinata feels a pang of guilt. _He couldn’t sleep because of me. I’m such a shitty friend._

“Hey,” He says softly, and Hinata can’t help but look at his lips, moving so gently, making his head fuzzy and his heart silly. “We really need to talk. At lunch, okay? Don’t run. I still…” Kageyama pushes open the door, pulling his bag strap over his head. “I still need to give you my response.”

Hinata’s chest clenches, and before he knows it, looking at Kageyama's back is too much for him, and there’s a clatter of his bike hitting the ground- he’s running in the opposite direction, face closing in on itself in an effort to contain the sudden tears, fat and hot, threatening to spill over and down his face. He thinks he can hear Kageyama yelling, but the pounding of his feet on pavement drowns it out. 

Like a band-aid. Slow down. Deal with it directly. Sooner rather than later. 

_No,_ Hinata thinks. _Run._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hiii.. i'm... not a very good writer.. but i really love kagehina... and i wanted to try writing again, because i have a lot of ideas..!! if my writing feels weird to read or i'm making any really awful writing mistakes, please let me know! id appreciate any feedback at all! i'm a terrible creative writer lmao but i'm trying my best (y)


	2. Morning

Okay, maybe this wasn’t the best idea.

He’s laying on the grass on a hill nearby school- out by the backroads, where some farms are. He takes a deep breath, feeling the sun on his skin, warm. Directly in contrast with how icy cold he feels inside.

Why did he have to run? He set out to deal with things head on today, to take what he deserves and live with it. Maybe he’s desperately trying to prolong the period of time before he gets thrown away by Kageyama. Like this, he can sort of pretend everything is okay. He winces a little, thinking about how he’s not at practice, but just thinking about having to pretend everything was normal enough to play with Kageyama, to _sync_ with him, trust him… he didn’t know if he could play confidently, with this storm of emotions whirling around inside of him.

And he’d have to look at Kageyama- an aware Kageyama. He couldn’t play off staring at him like he normally could, couldn’t sneak once-overs of his long arms, toned legs, and pretty fingers, slapping his back, tossing to him- 

_God_ , it _hurts_.

He kind of wishes he could rewind time. To before he realized his feelings and took an express train straight to hell. When they got meat buns together, helped each other with homework during lunch, stayed over each others houses and played video games, like normal friends do. It was fun, and happy, and perfect, and then he just had to have it click one day- Kageyama is really pretty.

_"Hey, idiot, don't get chip crumbs on the floor." Kageyama's bending down with a napkin, scooping up the remains of his empty bag of chips and throwing it in the trash._

_"Soooorrrryyyy!" Hinata draws it out, smiling. It's a pretty day outside, and he's way happier than he should be for having to spend it inside studying, but Kageyama's here, so it's fun. Things feel really light with them lately, easy, and Kageyama's making himself comfortable on the floor when it happens._

_The light shifts and hits at an angle, dusting across Kageyama's features. His skin is glowing, lips parted and eyelashes long. Hinata can see his eyes darting across the page of a math book, focused, totally unaware of the way Hinata's breath hitches, eyes going wide. He takes the opportunity to stare at Kageyama's forearms, the way the fabric of his sweater bunches up at the crook of his elbow. Imagines those arms around him, tight, and he's standing up._

_He excuses himself to the bathroom, loudly, a bewildered Kageyama nodding in return. Hinata's desperately trying to recall when he didn't think Kageyama's cheeks were rosy, cute, attractive, anything at all besides- well,_ pretty.

The wind gets strong, suddenly, blowing Hinata’s hair every which way and causing him to shiver. He pictures Kageyama’s fingers on his scalp, Kageyama’s knees smashed up side by side with his, his dark, glinting eyes staring straight through his physical being and unearthing everything he thought he was. 

He’s so dramatic, it’s insane, but it feels _so real_.

It felt real ever since they won their first match together, using their perfected quicks- the memory washes over him, warmer than the sun. It was after that fateful study date, when he realized Kageyama was more than just tall and cool.

When they won, Kageyama looked at him with pride and excitement burning in his eyes, rocking him to his very core. Overwhelmed, Hinata had dazedly thought, _So he can show that kind of look on his face, too._ He was staring at Kageyama so long his eyes stung and his heart had felt like it was tearing itself apart in its chest. Kageyama was hugging him, lifting him in the air, and he was frazzled by how this stupid idiot's face was making him feel. He had thought of it like a joke, Kageyama’s limited expressions- collect them all and win a prize! But he had been caught off guard by the _passion_.

Things changed seriously ever since that day. The dark, gloomy air around Kageyama changed into a rosy, pinkish hue- “Move, idiot.” sounded loving. Walking home together and eating lunch and hanging out all felt like cheating, suddenly, when he had these new, weird thoughts.

He contained it magnificently, though, all up until last night. God _damn_ it, last night. Hinata sat up straight, rubbing his face, positively glowing with heat. The sky seemed unsupportive, far off clouds growing dark. He remembers his phone buzzing this morning, and digs for it in his bag halfheartedly. It was probably just Kageyama yelling at him.

**—New Text—**

**Kageyama ヽ(ｏ`皿′ｏ)ﾉ**

_You're the baka, baka. I'm waiting for you, so come to practice._

His face screws up in a smile, squeezing his knees tight and shoving the phone closer to his face. Was he aware of what this would mean to Hinata when he sent it? It was almost like... Kageyama knew he was worried that things would be weird. Like he wanted to reassure him, or something. He dusted off his pants, standing up, and swung his bag back on his shoulder. He’s played hooky for long enough, mystical sky emotions be damned. 

He needed to hear what Kageyama had to say.

*~*~*

Kageyama is on autopilot. Hit ball, run, grab ball, hit ball, repeat. He sets to everyone, practices spiking and serving, and runs a lap before heading into the changing room with everyone else, Hinata’s bike propped up against the entrance where he had set it nearly an hour ago.

He looks at it for a second longer than what would be considered a glance and heads in, wanting to quickly change and get to class.

“Hey, Kageyama-kun! Daichi said that Hinata was with you when you got here, what happened? Why wasn’t he at practice?” Suga is five different kinds of in his face, craning his neck around, hands on his hips, looking for anything he can pounce on. In reality, he knew it was just concern, but everything felt cloying and invasive, his mind in other places.

Kageyama keeps his face still, heart rate normal, breath calm.

“I don’t know. He might have gotten sick.” Monotone. Don’t give anything away. Keep it together, dude. Suga’s ruthless, don’t let him see anything.

Suga raises one eyebrow and gives him a discerning eye. “It’s a little weird for Hinata to just ditch practice without even trying to play, don’t you think? He came in that one time with the flu, remember?”

Kageyama winces. That was a rough day. He feels faint glimmers of the outrage he had felt that Hinata had even left the house in that condition. 

“ _Take better care of yourself, idiot! How will we play when you’re dead from something as stupid and asinine as the fucking_ flu?!“  


_Hinata sheepishly looked up at him, decent enough to pretend to be ashamed at his recklessness, apologizing and faintly muttering about not wanting to miss a single one of his tosses before dozing off in the nurses office, leaving Kageyama red from the tips of his ears to the bottom of neck._

“Yes, I remember. I’m not sure. He just ran off.” Kageyama replies, calmly, trying not to let the memory of Hinata’s fever flushed face get to him. 

“Yeah, I saw the bike. Well… if you aren’t concerned, I guess it’s not that big of a deal,” Suga tapped his chin, lost in thought for a moment before letting it go, grinning. “You don't have to pretend like you aren't bothered, you know. I'm sure he'll be here to hit your tosses this afternoon!” He gets a slap on the back, and he’s stuttering, now.

“I-I'm not bothered! I feel fine!” Kageyama stands up, grabbing his bag, done changing. Suga's putting his hands up, face taking on concern. "Hey, Kageyama..." 

He takes a breath to calm down, tries to do damage control.

“Who gives a shit if Hinata doesn’t want to show up to practice?! Why would I waste time being concerned over that idiot?” Kageyama brings himself up to his full height, mustering up all his conviction while the color drains out of Suga’s face, eyes stuttering between something else and Kageyama, hands lowering. “What he wants to do with his time is his own goddamn business, I don’t need him to toss!”

He whips around, takes a step, and stops mid-air, because Hinata is standing in the doorway, why the fuck didn’t he see this coming, and he’s gone as quick as he was there. He’d think it was a hallucination if it wasn’t for the deathly silence in the club room, and he can feel everyones eyes on him, judging. Can feel Daichi about to holler at him about teamwork and bullshit- he’s already running. 

He’s out the door, but there’s no familiar shock of orange, no matter how much he scans the surrounding area-just an increasingly gloomy sky on what was supposed to be a beautiful, cloudless day. Hinata’s bike is gone, and Kageyama draws inside of himself, frowning, aura growing as dark as the clouds closing in on the sky.

He storms to class, and people get out of his way more than normal- word quickly spreads throughout the school that the freak quick duo are having problems in paradise, and Kageyama wants to scream at everyone that they don’t know the whole story, it’s not like that, and has anyone fucking seen Hinata?

But he just sits in class, tapping his pen on the desk, thinking about how just _yesterday_ they had walked to school, normal as ever, totally unaware of the shit that tomorrow would bring.

Why was Hinata acting like this? He didn’t fucking understand. He had been doing so _well_ , all emotions in check and restraining himself _so_ efficiently, so "it" never leaked out when he was around him. His stupid, overwhelmingly gay feelings for wide, amber eyes and orange hair and tiny gasps- and then he gets a _literal dream scenario_ and fucks it all up. So maybe the fault lies with him, maybe Hinata's tired eyes, how scared he was this morning- maybe that's all on him.

How could he have handled this better? He agonizes over possibilities of sequences of events, but it’s no good. He realizes the ink has burst out of his pen and people are staring, including the teacher.

Kageyama excuses himself to go to the bathroom, and now he’s alone, too alone, and his heart finally sinks like it wanted to, screamed to, when he saw the look on Hinata’s face for that split second in the club room. He was such an idiot, saying those things out of some misguided attempt to appear like everything was normal, this weird rivalry was still intact, and he was in no way in love with an idiot like that. Tears prick at his eyes, and he’s bent over the sink, gritting his teeth.

He snaps up. Enough. When lunch comes around, he’s tracking Hinata down, and he’s going to _fix this shit_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry if things are confusing right now ;__; it'll get cleared up in chapter 3!!! thanks for reading! i feel like i made the plot a little weird for my first kagehina fanfiction, but... hopefully it's readable lmao


	3. The Afternoon Before

“Yes!” Hinata’s hand stung, having just successfully completed five quick sets in a row. Breathing hard, he looks over at Kageyama, his eyes flashing and hands balled up into fists, half a dimple ghosting his cheek. Hinata feels blown away, and he really thinks his heart might forcefully slam itself out of his chest, blood splattering everywhere and landing with a _thump_ on the gym floor. His expressions were getting more free with him, not feeling quite so methodically controlled. He felt warm.

They headed to get changed, and it was an arduous struggle to avoid looking at Kageyama for too long, focused on buttoning his jacket, fingers working quickly and gracefully. Before he knows it, Kageyama’s waiting for him at the door, telling him to hurry up. His attention snaps back to pulling on his shoes, face growing red. How much longer could he pretend he was resilient enough to keep himself in check? With the way the setting sun was making Kageyama’s back glow, shadows accentuating all his features… _probably not much longer,_ he thinks wryly.

They’re walking home, side by side, and Hinata can barely contain himself. But he’s been doing well for so, _so_ long and what if he’s literally driven into insanity by being so _Kageyama, Kageyama, Kageyama_ all the time, always? It’s not like things would change much, he’s just asking for a little relief. Maybe an “I like you,” whispered behind his back, during a game or something so it’s hard to hear. He feels a pair of eyes on him, and he jumps out of his train of thought.

Kageyama’s looking at him weird, and he opens his mouth like he’s going to chide him for working himself up so much, but his unsaid words are interrupted when his eyes dart forward and his arm flashes out in front of Hinata, palm suddenly on his chest stopping him. He tears himself away from Kageyama’s face to see what it is that they’ve stopped for, and-

It’s a girl.

“Sorry! Oh, I’m sorry. Uh,” The girl has small features, a short black bob and blue eyes, darting up and down. “I, I was wondering if we could talk… um, if you have the time, for maybe a minute."

_Timid,_ Hinata thinks. _She’s cute._

He’s all huge grins and sunshine in a second, all “sure, I don’t mind!” and “excuse me!” burying down the wry pressure of Kageyama getting confessed to, again, and having to agonize about how he wishes it were that easy for him, again, but is stopped by a small tug. The girl had reached out, fingers closed on his jacket, her face blushing furiously, looking almost… angry.

 _Like a girl version of Kageyama._ he thinks faintly, and the girl is saying something, but Hinata looks up and the real Kageyama is looking like death itself with his eyes bugging out of his head like that. His hand is still half in the air, unsure of what to do. His feet are planted firmly on the ground, but his legs are wavering.

“…you, no offense to your… friend, if you don’t mind?” The girl drops her hand, suddenly timid again. Hinata slowly looks back at her face, and yeah, this is weird.

“I’m sorry, what?” is his curt reply.

“Idiot!" Kageyama’s in motion again, slapping his back and adjusting his bag. “I’m going ahead.” What? Is Kageyama seriously just going to ditch this girl? He looks back at her, nervously.

The girl looks visibly more comfortable as Kageyama briskly walks away, but Hinata is still confused. Did he expect him to deal with this girl for him? How should he know if Kageyama wants to date her? They would look like a matching set, and Hinata would die a little bit inside every time he saw them, so he hopes his answer is the stock, _I’m sorry, but I’m focusing on volleyball right now._

“Sorry, he can be really rude, you know? I could probably relay a message to him, though, if you’d like.” Hinata decides it’s only polite to offer, but the girls face screws up again.

“No, I mean, it was you I wanted to talk to! Um, Hinata, I think you’re amazing! You can jump so high, and move so fast-“ She’s leaning forward now, clutching something in her hands, eyes starry. “I really admire you, and I was hoping I could offer you th- this!! This token of my affections!” She finishes in a rush and bows, face down, holding out a polka dot plastic bag with cute spiral ribbons tying it shut.

Hinata hesitates, pointing up at his face. “Me?”

The girl glances up, with one eye open, her face glowing pink. “Y-Yes.”

Hinata reaches out and takes the bag, dumbfounded. “Sugar cookies! For you. I, I don’t know if… I guessed, you know, um,” The girl looks up at the sky, lips wobbling, trying to gather up gumption. Her head snaps back down. “So! Will you go out with me!”

He’s about to laugh out loud in wonder, but quickly realizes that could be misconstrued pretty badly in this situation. His first confession. A couple of months ago, he would have jumped 10 feet in the air and kissed this girl on the cheek.

“I’m sorry!” He bows quickly and the girl looks crestfallen. “Thank you for the kind words! I’m really, really touched!” He’s almost shouting now, and the girl looks flustered, waving her hands, biting her bottom lip. He sheepishly rubs the back of his head, looking apologetic.

“I already have someone important to me,” Is what comes tumbling out of his mouth. "You should give these to someone who deserves your affections!” Hinata holds out the plastic bag, genuinely feeling bad. And the girl closes her hands around his. 

“No, take them! As thanks for working so hard! I made them with you in mind, so…” She jumps back, suddenly aware of her hands, and looks down. “It’d be weird to give them to someone else, so… I’ll still come to your matches!” She looks determined, and Hinata really wonders for a second what it’d be like to date this sweet girl who likes him and likes volleyball.

Pretty awful, he decides, thinking about the way Kageyama sneers, and Hinata laughs out loud. “Thank you!” Hinata smiles, tucking the gift in his bag. _I really am an idiot._ He's thanking the girl and getting her name before waving and taking off, wondering how far Kageyama has gone and if he can catch up. He feels a little bad, turning down someone so earnest with their feelings.

 _She was brave._ Hinata wondered if he could be that brave, baking cookies with his wishes in them, giving them to Kageyama with an honest confession. He rubs his cheeks, hard, before he overheats. Breaking into a sprint, he barrels down the hill, corner store in sight and a looming figure leaning against a vending machine. He glows pink and leaves sparkles in his wake, heart pattering. _Maybe I’m not quite there yet._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lol im so mean but im gonna hold on to what happened for just a LIL longer... but there's the origin of the cookies!! a short chapter (/__\;;) i also edited the two first chapters a little bit, tweaking some stuff and adding in some more details! hopefully it's a bit easier to read now. i'm still struggling with writing clearly!


	4. Evening

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this in an hour before falling asleep on my phone after remembering this fic exists and I apparently wrote it

Hinata was going to _drop this shit_.

After thinking about it- monologuing, really, in the middle of class- it actually made sense. Why ruin a perfectly good, cohesive partnership? They could easily rise to the top together and achieve all their volleyball dreams- so why muck it all up just for the sake of his... Feelings? Kageyama, bless his soul, just isn't ever going to like him back. It's not happening. After all, he doesn't even need him to rise to the top, right? 

Hinata shook his head, trying not to think about earlier. He was in a weird state of denial- it happened, Kageyama definitely said those things, but thinking about it was too... Painful. Even if he was angry, what is Hinata supposed to think? Is he mad at him for what happened last night? Does he hate him? He seemed fine earlier, at the bus stop... at least, he was cordial. So, there's only one course of action to take. 

He has to leave him alone. Let him simmer down a bit, and then... Things will blow over. They'll laugh about this, maybe at practice where they're playing volleyball, which is really what matters here, and who is Hinata's idiot heart to get in the way of volleyball? Maybe he'll even find that girl, and... Hinata winces. No, probably not. 

Diverting his slouch to the window, Hinata looks out at the sky and tries to not think about anything, immediately failing. How nice it would be if he didn't fall in love with his volleyball partner. How nice it would be if his volleyball partner loved him back.

\--

Panting and sweaty, Hinata slows his pace to a stop next to the strangely aloof Kageyama.

"Why.... _woof_.... Did you... ah, one sec," Hinata was breathing hard, holding his back and fanning himself as Kageyama looked politely disinterested. "Woo."

"Take your time." He wasn't meeting his eyes. "I wasn't expecting you." Kageyama spoke flatly.

"Why'd you leave? You should've waited for me!" Hinata was a little annoyed Kageyama went so far ahead, and is acting all polite about it. He could almost mistake it for kindness, which is too much for Hinata, honestly.

Ignoring the question, Kageyama bent down a little and peered at his bag, then looked up at Hinata in the eyes for the first time, causing a mild shiver down his spine. They were eerily empty compared to the lovely- er, _lively_ blue ones he was used to.

"You took them." He looked back at the bag. "Why didn't you walk her home?"

Oh, right. The confession. 

"She made me take them. I didn't walk her home because I... I turned her down." Kageyama's eyes widened with an emotion Hinata couldn't place. "...Uh. Yeah, I don't know-"

"You _don't know?_ Don't know what?" Kageyama spat, face suddenly contorting with disgust. "She was perfect, wasn't she? You're always whining about wanting a cute girlfriend, aren't you?"

Hinata blushed beet red, remembering all the times he joined in with Tanaka and Noya talking about girls. It felt fun at the time, like camaraderie- he hadn't realized Kageyama interpreted it quite like _that._

"That's just messing around with sempai! It's funny, it's just, I don't know, guy talk. It's not serious."

"Pretty specific guy talk. 'Holding hands, sharing lunch, walking home,'" Kageyama held up his hands in mock frustration, almost rolling his eyes. "'Sounds like a dream!' I think you've said things along those lines."

"Yeah, but!" Hinata couldn't blush harder. He never imagined Kageyama was listening intently enough to remember this stuff, stuff he said _while thinking about Kageyama._ "That's... Everyone thinks that! And wants to do those things! Hypothetically!"

Kageyama straightened up, looking down on him, shadows cast over his face. "Hypothetically, huh?" He sniffed. "With who?"

Hinata stopped breathing. "What?"

"With who? Who do you think about doing those things with? If not her, who?" 

It was weird for Kageyama to get this intense about something. Actually, it was downright bizarre he wasn't letting this drop. Why now, about this? Hinata had an idea, but... Chalk it up to wishful thinking. Kageyama probably just wants to walk home alone with some peace and quiet for once. 

Hypothetically, though, if Hinata were to entertain the idea that it could possibly be rational to consider, again, hypothetically, that Kageyama was... maybe... Jealous? Well, that's enough to send him over the edge. Just the thought of a reality where Kageyama liked him, looked at him with the same passion off the court as on it? That sent shivers down Hinata's spine- none of which caused by fear.

He thought of that girl from earlier, and how brave she was. What if he just said it? Took his hand and whispered, 'You.' Told him the truth, the whole truth. He thinks about holding his awe-inspiring, beautiful hands, tight in his own. He thinks about eating lunch together and laying his head in his lap. Told him all about how he runs his hands over where Kageyama's shadow casts over him and blushes after he steals a sip of his milk box because that's a second-hand kiss, not overheating from the sun.

How he's turning into a completely insane, love-addled fool and can't live like this anymore, and it's him, of course it's him, it's always been him, since middle school it was always, always only Kageyama.

"Hm. I guess... Volleyball. A really nice, round one." Hinata's face split into a grin. "One with cute lines, y'know? Good colors." 

He puts his hands in his pockets and shoves Kageyama with his shoulder, walking ahead, trying to hide his face.

Kageyama looks at Hinata's back, frowning. "You're an idiot. Do you make out with volleyballs in the store room? Is that why you take so long to clean up?"

Kageyama moves to catch up and they start walking again, slowly, and Hinata feels like the matter has been dropped and things can go back to normal. Pining, torturous normal. They're at the intersection where they part ways and he's about to say "'night!" and blast outta there when Kageyama fidgets. It's so cute that Hinata freezes.

"A volleyball can't kiss you back."

"Eh?!" Hinata laughs nervously. "I know that."

"That girl... She could kiss you back. She could hold your hand and shit." Kageyama looked too serious for what he was saying. Mad, almost. But that's just how his face looks, right? Hinata looks away, down at the ground.

"Yeah, but... You know. I only have time for volleyball. Why do you want me to have a girlfriend so badly anyway?" Hinata was internally praying for Kageyama to stop talking about this. He could get confused and then everything would just be harder. 

"I don't!" He snapped. Hinata looked up, startled. "I'm just saying, you talk about it a lot, and if it makes you happy, you should do it. If getting a girlfriend means you stop moping around, you should just get one. Forget it." 

Hinata was so confused. His brain was screaming, _He cares about me! He wants me to be happy!_ But his heart was hurting, whispering, _He wants me to be happy with a girl._

The frustration bubbling up inside him caused him to shout, "You know what would make me happy?!"

Kageyama's face pinched up. "What?"

It was the softest second of Hinata's life. His step forward turned into a stumble, and he looked up in what felt like slow-mo as long, fast arms closed around him, and they moved their heads at the same time, bringing his face in an instant to Kageyama's. It was glorious, complete luck. Their were barely touching and he saw fireworks. And then it was over. Because Hinata was running as fast as his legs could go, white noise ringing in his ears, into the night.

Oh, no.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heh... u think kageyama will go after him... ??? into the night??? no way he's gonna go home and make a hot toddy


End file.
